This Hamster Shit Is Stressing Me Out

Oh good, forever more I'll be googled on "hamster shit."

Listen, the thing about hamsters is that they bury their healthy young (as opposed to eating their unhealthy or too numerous young) way deep in a makeshift nest, in this case 1st-grade lined notebook paper and super-absorbent paper towel pieces, so that you (or as we hear in group, keep it personal--"I") I mean, I, don't know if I killed the babies or not.

I think I saw one pink nose move.

Hard to know.

1 out of 13 wouldn't be a complete failure.

I bought Similac baby formula because I read it can help the nursing mother hamster. She doesn't like it. I don't blame her. She'll probably have nightmares of a huge cow stomping her nest.

The more I try to help, the more I don't.

In other news, school starts Monday, and with the time change I guess we'll be getting up about 2 in the morning now. That'll be extra fun. I told my friend, this is the time of year kids get run over by buses because we turn the time back and it's dark again at 6 a.m. She said, no, November is when they get run over by buses because it's dark in the morning AND at night. I said, no, I think there are more bus-kid accidents when the clock turns back. She said no, it's in winter, because it's dark when the kids catch the bus and when they come home.

I said whatever, I'm glad I car pool.